Another Reason To Hate Teen Gamers

Not all of 'em. But a lot of 'em. lol

A few days ago, I wrote a blog article on games that would showcase professionals playing through games for the purpose of maximizing the customer's (i.e. my) enjoyment over time. It would make a game like Final Fantasy become the film / visual novel it was always meant to be. Same for a whole host of other RPGs. Wind Waker? Enjoy the story, say buh-bye to the annoying "now where do I go next? *head scratch* *waste 2 hours sailing to 4 incorrect islands and to the correct island but failing to do open the sealed door in precisely the manner the game demands of you*" gameplay.

My friend Keith writes:

Your "commercial play through" idea exists... http://www.joystiq.com/2009/06/14/new-super-mario-bros-wii-future-titles-will-play-themselves/

Click the blog article title to read on! :)

I respond:

Sweet! Too bad every punk with internet access responding to that article seems to think it's a horrible idea. :\ I hope Nintendo and the other companies IGNORE THEM while listening to me. What are these kids moping about? He's not proposing making the games *just* auto-play! He's suggesting including both in the same package! It's perfect.

lol @ the kids who invented for themselves this notion that "last time I checked, games were about the challenge." Games have always been about entertainment. Period. When challenge ceases to be entertaining is when games do, too, and Miyamoto is offering us a way around that dilemma. Shut up, twerps, and let the man work his magic! :)

Keith responds:

it all depends on much discipline you have, its kinda like having a cheat book that comes along with the game. Sure, Mario is fairly linear and we all know the main objective, get from point A to point B so theres no confusion there. But lets think about another game, perhaps Zelda or Metroid, which has puzzles and varying strategies to each stage. Lets say you get stuck, how long do you persist until you say screw this, I'll just watch the game auto play itself.

I respond, lengthily:

But that's not my nor anybody else's problem: that's that individual kid's problem. That's what I would unapologetically tell him: "it's not my problem that you play a Zelda dungeon run for 5 minutes, give up in frustration, watch the game do it in Auto-Play, and then after watching the game do it become filled with regret, hating yourself for being so weak and wishing you could turn back time and try it once more for yourself."

Let me put it another way: these kids are saying, "I hate Harry Potter Movie 7 spoilers! Nobody should be allowed to talk about Harry Potter 7 until I've seen the movie! Because if they do talk about it, I'm afraid I can't keep myself from doing a Google search and reading all the juicy spoilers." This kid would have us delete GameFAQS.com because "the existence of those walkthrus is too tempting for me to ignore, but I have self-esteem issues every time I cave in and use one of 'em. So since I can't control myself, you don't get to have 'em either." Wth, kid.

Now on the other hand. Let's say the kid says to me, "Oh yeah, Mister? Well right back at you! It's not my problem you don't have time to figure out the puzzles on your own!" All I can say to that is, he's being a petulant child to force his standard of living onto my own. I'm a med student. I have books to study, patients to attend to, things to get done! If and when I do have time for R&R, if it's a video game that's mostly about the story (like Final Fantasy or Zelda) I would MUCH rather watch the game auto-play itself and grab some popcorn and a blanket and watch it like a movie than I would stumble through the same obtuse puzzle 10 times over because my carpal tunnel doesn't let me execute the button combo as flawlessly as I have to, and I keep falling into a pit and dying and being sent back to a spawn point that was 10 minutes away from where we just were.

If he thinks it's "fun" and "challenging" to waste 50 minutes of your 1-hour R&R break walking from Spawn Point A to Final Destination B, then good for him.

Me? I think it's a big waste of my time, my teachers' time, and my patients' time. Let my 60 minutes of R&R be 60 minutes spent on the story, and not 10 minutes of story for 50 minutes of blah. And any twerpy teen who wants to tell me, "NOOOOOOOOOO! >O If you make the games like this it'll ruin them for meeeeeeeeeeee!" can get real. :P I'm very unapologetic about this point: because I'm sick of people trying to force themselves onto others.

Is Miyamoto axing the kid's game style in favor of mine? NO! He's letting us BOTH have what we want. He's letting the kid game *and* letting me watch the movie-game play itself. If he doesn't like that? TOUGH SHIT. :\

Rant over. :)

For the record, Keith and I aren't arguing. I'm arguing at the non-present 3rd party (the brats on Joystiq), and he's just playing devil's advocate. I'll let Keith say more on this if/when he wants, but thought I'd clue you in first for those of you who don't know Keith well. (Especially since we may have two new readers! ;D Time will tell.)

Anyway, thoughts? Opinions? Concerns? Do you agree with me or disagree with me? Are you like the Joystiq kiddos who feels that auto-play is going to compromise the games' integrity for you? If so, tell me why!