Situations: pure chance or forged from the fires of willpower?

I think I've blogged on this topic before, but it's come up again and it's one of my personal pet peeves about the world we live in, so here we go once again: romantic relationships and the preceding situations which promote them!

I know there's some degree of danger in putting my faith in film, television, and books when it comes to observing how men lucky in love first met their lady loves and how they progressed from acquaintanceship to partnership. But the thing is, it seems to me to be such a ubiquitous premise that I can't help but wonder if there really is some truth to it: that there are men for whom these chance circumstances occur and for whom love is more of an inescapable known than otherwise.

I'm not talking about alien girls falling through apartment ceilings or abandoned robot girls being retrieved from the garbage. I'm talking about the following sorts of things:
- a lady drops her briefcase; its contents spill out over the subway platform; and you quickly help her pick them up; after they're all picked up, you continue to talk with her, maybe gain her name? You return to the same platform at the same time of day the next few days, and finally you see her again. This time you approach, start up conversation, and ask if she wants to get a drink or something.

- a lady is mugged; but you, being armed with a gun or knowing jujitsu or some such, fend off her would-be attacker. We all know what follows from this.

- a newly-hired temp secretary is late for work and locked out of the building. You, an employee at the same company, are also late for work but you have a cardkey. You let both of yourselves in, and introduce yourself to her and tell her what floor you work on.

Three examples, three ways to get my point across. I think you've probably gotten a good idea of what I'm talking about now. The point I'm trying to make is, it seems like prospective romance is accelerated when a man rescues a woman from trouble, be it small (the briefcase), medium (the work lockout), or large (the mugging).

Isn't this sort of sick? twisted? perverse? That one of the easiest ways in which a man and woman may fall in love requires the woman to suffer?

And if your answer is "No," then I ask you, "Would it not, then, be perfectly acceptable for a man to force these seemingly-'chance' events in order to introduce himself to attractive women?" And if your answer to this is, "No, that is unacceptable" (and I'm inclined to agree -- it's psych. perverse and also it's quite dishonest and builds a relationship upon a foundation that never really existed), then we reach this final challenge: "Why is it acceptable for Fate to force these events but not Man?"